(A Comprehensive Collection of Quotes and Sayings about Food Preparation and Dining Tips for
those retirees who want to retire happy and
age
well)
Never commit yourself to a cheese without having first examined it.
— T. S. Elliot
One cannot think well, love well, sleep well, if one has not dined well.
— Virginia Woolf
Oh, it's cool. I wear a white dress and I can eat yoghurt, cup a soup and hazelnuts now.
— Cassie Aisenworth
Mustard's no good without roast beef.
— Chico Marx
If you are wondering if you took the meat out to thaw, you didn't.
— Unknown wise person
If you're wondering if you left the coffee pot plugged in, you did.
— Unknown wise person
I'm at the age where food has taken the place of sex in my life. In fact, I've just had a
mirror put over my kitchen table.
— Rodney Dangerfield
There are nine ways of poaching eggs, and each of them is worse than the other.
— Robert Lynd
Music with dinner is an insult both to the cook and the violinist.
— G. K. Chesterton
I no longer prepare food or drink with more than one ingredient.
— Cyra McFadden
At a dinner party one should eat wisely but not too well, and talk well but not too wisely.
— W. Somerset Maugham
A knife too dull to cut anything else can always cut your finger.
— Fausner's Rule of the Household
He who does not mind his belly, will hardly mind anything else.
— Samuel Johnson
The right diet directs sexual energy into the parts that matter.
— Barbara Cartland
Edible. Good to eat and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pig, a pig
to a man, and a man to a worm.
— Ambrose Bierce, American author, The Devil's Dictionary
If you wish to grow thinner, diminish your dinner,
And take to light claret instead of pale ale;
Look down with an utter contempt upon butter,
And never touch bread till it's toasted — or stale
— H. S. Leigh
[Retirement] life is too short to stuff a mushroom.
— Shirley Conran
Eating is not merely a material pleasure. Eating well gives a spectacular joy to life and contributes
immensely to goodwill and happy companionship. It is of great importance to the morale.
— Elsa Schiaparelli
Don't take a butcher's advice on how to cook meat. If he knew, he'd be a chef.
— Andy Rooney
Old people shouldn't eat health
foods. They need all the preservatives they can get.
— Robert Orben
Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is knowing never to put it in a fruit salad.
— Unknown wise person
I did toy with the idea of doing a cook-book . . . . The recipes were to be the routine ones: how to make
dry toast, instant coffee, hearts of lettuce and brownies. But as an added attraction, at no extra charge, my
idea was to put a fried egg on the cover. I think a lot of people who hate literature but love fried eggs would
buy it if the price was right.
— Groucho Marx
Any dish that tastes good with capers in it tastes even better with capers not in it.
— Nora Ephron
To the old saying that man built the house but woman made of it a "home" might be added the modern
supplement that woman accepted cooking as a chore but man has made of it a recreation.
— Emily Post
A woman should never be seen eating or drinking, unless it be lobster salad and Champagne, the only true
feminine & becoming viands.
— Lord Byron
There is no love sincerer than the love of food.
— George Bernard Shaw
If you're going to America, bring your own food.
— Fran Lebowitz
It is the mark of a mean, vulgar and ignoble spirit to dwell on the thought of food before meal times or
worse to dwell on it afterwards, to discuss it and wallow in the remembered pleasures of every mouthful. Those
whose minds dwell before dinner on the spit, and after on the dishes, are fit only to be scullions.
— Saint Francis de Sales
Tis an ill cook that cannot lick his own fingers.
— William Shakespeare
The only really good vegetable is Tabasco sauce. Put Tabasco sauce in everything.
— P. J. O'Rourke
Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many.
—
from The
Joy of Not Working: A Book for the Retired, Unemployed, and
Overworked
Purchase The
Joy of Not Working (The World's Second Best
Retirement Book) through these direct links:
Gluttony is an emotional escape, a sign something is eating us.
— Peter De Vries
My idea of heaven is a great big baked potato and someone to share it with.
— Oprah Winfrey
Everything ends this way in France. Weddings, christenings, duels, burials, swindlings, affairs of state-
everything is a pretext for a good dinner.
— Jean Anouilh
Sadder than destitution, sadder than a beggar is the man who eats alone in public. Nothing more contradicts
the laws of man or beast, for animals always do each other the honor of sharing or disputing each other's
food.
— Jean Baudrillard
Appetite comes with eating.
— French Proverb
Blow in its ear.
— Johnny Carson on the best way to thaw a frozen turkey
You needn't tell me that a man who doesn't love oysters and asparagus and good wines has got a soul, or a
stomach either. He's simply got the instinct for being unhappy highly developed.
— Saki
Sharing food with another human being is an intimate act that should not be indulged in lightly.
— M. F. K. Fisher
You are where you eat.
— Unknown wise person
The trouble with eating Italian food is that five or six days later you're hungry again.
— George Miller
Why is it that when vegetarians come to you, you're expected to provide food for them, but if you went
to their house you'd never say, "I can't eat this muck. Would you grill me a thick steak?".
— Simon Hoggart, Guardian columnist
Lunch is for wimps.
— Oliver Stone
He who cannot eat horsemeat need not do so. Let him eat pork. But he who cannot eat pork, let him eat
horsemeat. It's simply a question of taste.
— Nikita Khrushchev
Roast Beef, Medium, is not only a food. It is a philosophy. Seated at Life's Dining Table, with the menu of
Morals before you, your eye wanders a bit over the entrées, the hors d'oeuvres, and the things à la though you
know that Roast Beef, Medium, is safe and sane, and sure.
— Edna Ferber
He who eats alone chokes alone.
— Arab Proverb
The act of putting into your mouth what the earth has grown is perhaps your most direct interaction with the
earth.
— Frances Moore Lappé
To safeguard one's health at the cost of too strict a diet is a tiresome illness indeed.
— François, Duc de La Rochefoucauld
Upscale people are fixated with food simply because they are now able to eat so much of it without getting
fat, and the reason they don't get fat is that they maintain a profligate level of calorie expenditure. The
very same people whose evenings begin with melted goats cheese . . . get up at dawn to run, break for a
mid-morning aerobics class, and watch the evening news while racing on a stationary bicycle.
— Barbara Ehrenreich
Anybody who believes that the way to man's heart is through his stomach flunked geography.
— Robert Byrne
A man seldom thinks with more earnestness of anything than he does of his dinner.
— Samuel Johnson
Kissing don't last: cookery do!
— George Meredith
It if tastes good, it's trying to kill you.
— Roy Qualley